Hello guys! I hope you are well!

Today i’m talking about something very personal for me. Loss and grief.

Among all the great pictures we post of our lives on social media, I guess we never really fully know what someone is going through. I bet you wouldn’t believe me if I said i’d lost someone really close to me every single year for the past four years? Including this year – just a month ago.

I thought it was a good time to talk about this topic as tomorrow marks a year since we lost my grandma. My grandma who we grew up with, lived with us and held a very special place in our hearts. This was also just after we lost my niece at just twelve years old. I’d be lying if I said this year had been easy – but overcoming it and desperately wanting the new year to start made me think that it might benefit others to better understand what they may go through if they’ve lost someone and ways that they could manage it better from someone who has also been in a similar position.

I wanted to divide this post into two sections – firstly I wanted to talk about what to expect when you’ve lost someone and secondly, some useful things to help you along this journey of grief.

Things to expect when you’ve lost someone.

I’ve mentioned this first as I often hear people say that they feel they’re not grieving properly or the way they should be doing – just a little insight into this guys – there is no one way to grieve and I promise, you are doing just fine.

1. Everybody grieves differently.

I have put this first as it is the most important. I have never met two people who have grieved in the same way. So if you see someone else ‘dealing with it better’ than you – chances are, they may have found it difficult prior to this or potentially have a different way of showing it. Do not punish yourself for grieving – it is so so important you are kind to yourself during this time and I promise you WILL begin to deal with it better in time.

2. Don’t expect others to understand – chances are they won’t.

I can definitely say from experiencing a lot of loss, I can relate better to people who are grieving. However, I will still say – I have no idea what they are going through. Try not to get upset when people say “I understand how you’re feeling” (because they fricking don’t right?), but also – try not to have expectations that they will. It puts a lot of pressure on another person if you constantly make it known that they have no idea what you’re going through – so just try to be patient, I promise they’re trying – something I realised after a long time.

3. You will notice who your true friends/family are.

During a time of loss, when you have so many emotions already – disappointment is definitely one of the worst feelings. I have always always said it is easy to be there for someone through their good times, but to be there through the bad takes A LOT. Alhamdulilah throughout my bad times – I did have a great support system, but even the little things of who calls and messages to see how you’re doing mean so much more – and you can filter through who really is there for you. If you are currently grieving and feel someone isn’t there for you enough – maybe just tell them, because as I said earlier, they may just really not understand what you are going through and if after you’ve told them they still act the same – then you know I guess?

4. You’ll be irritable and angry – and everyone will just make it worse.

Because you’re feeling overwhelmed already – everything and everyone will exacerbate this. You might find yourself getting angry at things that never angered you before or seeing someones text and feeling like you just want to throw your phone in their face – even though they’ve not really said anything wrong. It’s all because you’re frustrated – and this is okay. You feel like what has happened is unfair and why did it happen to you? You’re a good person and everything in life right now is just shit. Try the one minute rule – before you respond or react, take a minute and think about what you’re really responding to – chances are you’ll realise that when you are your normal self – you probably wouldn’t respond this way and just think if its worth it.

5. You’ll cry randomly – and most likely think something is wrong with you.

I remember after my grandma and Emaan died, I cried every single day and I was like WHAT THE HELL JUST STOP ALREADY. It was so unlike me as I hadn’t cried this much before. There was then this one night where I cried SOOOO much I couldn’t even breathe and funnily enough – this was the last time I cried – till just last week. Yup that’s right – I hadn’t cried in a whole year and last week I was praying and at the end of praying I just cried. But this is fine, it is allowed to happen and again, there is nothing wrong with you. You need an outlet for your pain and for some people – crying helps release all the emotions, for others it may not. I am not depressed or upset – it’s merely just part of the process of overcoming loss and as long as you can get on with things after this – you’re doing great.

6. You’ll feel guilty.

You’re probably going to think did you show them enough love whilst they were alive? Did you appreciate them enough? Why did you get angry with them? After my grandma died – I spent months thinking whether I could have made her last days easier for her. Why did I used to get angry with her over the smallest things? Why did I shout? Why did I fight with my brother even though she hated it? (He was her favourite). Why did I not just tell her she was such a blessing in my life and shower her with all the love and deeds I could. Even writing this now makes me teary because its the harsh reality guys, we don’t appreciate people until they are gone – never as much as we should anyway. But again, if you are just going to think about it over and over again and feel guilty for it – is it going to change what happened? My advice is to do as much as you can to make up for it now that they’re gone. I went to my grandmas grave and planted flowers and sat for hours and just talked to myself/her for quite a while after she died – my own way of making up for all the brattiness and love I probably didn’t show. And more than anything – you probably did a heck of a lot – don’t waste your time with guilt, it’s not worth it and changes nothing.

Things you can do to help yourself.

As I’ve kind of mentioned before – grief is complicated and hard and there is unfortunately no magic wand to help us get over it, but I do believe there are things that I learnt to do as time went on which did help with my acceptance of my losses.

1. You need time off – TRUST ME.

Sometimes the easiest thing to do when you’re overwhelmed and grieving is to just get stuck back in to daily life because distraction is easier than facing your feelings. I would advise anyone grieving to be kind to yourself and take time off. Have some time with your family to mourn your loss, but more than anything, to overcome what you have just been through. Going back to your ‘normal life’ when you’re not in the right frame of mind is not good for yourself or others around you. People don’t understand what you’re going through and chances are, if you’re acting normal – they’re going to act normal too and before you know it you’ll be at work feeling overwhelmed with pressure and may have to take time off later.

2. Speak to others.

A lot of people don’t want to burden others when they’re grieving, because who wants to hang around with someone who’s feeling down all the time? Honestly – those people do want to be there for you. Talk to others about how you’re feeling – even if they didn’t ask. I’m a big talker (incase you didn’t notice) and when I was grieving i’d randomly bring it up to my close people sometimes, just talk about random memories or feelings. This is fine. They did nothing – they didn’t take away the pain or change anything, but that outlet is necessary.

3.Be grateful for what you still have – don’t lose yourself to grief.

This is so so important guys. It is sooo easy to get caught up in your grief and to almost lose yourself to it. Some people become so low that they feel that their whole life now needs to be based on this loss. I get it – it’s crappy and no one can bring that person back – but you know what’s even worse, if you don’t start to think about all that you still have. Channel all of the energy you take to grieve into appreciating what is still around. Since we lost my grandma I appreciate my parents SO much more, my mum is pretty much my best friend and believe it or not – appreciating each other when my grandma had gone is what got us through our grief. I appreciate my sisters so much more since we lost Emaan – someone who was a sister to two of my beautiful nieces. The thought that I am so so lucky I still have a sister is enough for me to care so much more for them. Start living and measuring your life by what you still have, not what you lost. Always remember and pay tribute to the people we have lost – but don’t lose yourself in the process.

4. Take every day at a time.

Guys, when I was younger I was going through a difficult time and my best friend said to me “Tayyeba – stop thinking about the next week or next year or next day even – just get through today and this is the new rule okay?” – I never knew something so simple could help me so much for the future. Guys honestly this advice has stuck in my head ever since and it is the way I take on nearly all of lifes challenges. Every time you feel overwhelmed or sad or like this is never going to end – just get to the end of the day – that is your only goal for the day. You will be surprised how one day you will feel less numb, less sad and you will have overcome so much, just by taking every day at a time.

5. Remember them in a good way.

I feel especially in Pakistani culture, you need to always be sad when someone dies and really show how upset you are. I think it’s equally as important to remember them and be happy. Smile, watch videos and celebrate their life. A month ago we lost two of my aunties which was a big shock for us. One of them was quite ill and the night she passed, dad spent the night showing us photos and videos of her being happy in her last months – we smiled and laughed and it was so beautiful to remember her like this, as well as grieve for the loss.

6. Pinterest and reading blog posts helps.

Guys – it’s a little strange telling anyone about this but believe it or not, when i’m feeling down and want to find some peace with how I feel – I read quotes on Pinterest and read blog posts (oh hey there). When I wanted to know how to feel when I was grieving or wanted some advice, i’d get on to Google and start looking at peoples blog posts about it – It helped me massively as it made me realise I am not alone. I lost myself reading things sometimes as it really brought me some inner peace reading things that I could really relate to at the time. Same with quotes – when you see something that just captures everything you feel in one picture – it can really help.

7. Pray pray pray.

I would definitely say through my grief – I turned to prayer so much more. Sometimes when I felt drained of the world and did not want to talk to anyone, I would lose myself in prayer and just talk through things and honestly this massively helped. Even just having my own time after Namaz to just have a little cry to myself and then get on with the day. This is something I practise regularly Alhamdulilah but I would definitely say through my grief, having that time helped me more than anything and probably got me more into praying on an every day basis. As they say “A calamity that brings you closer to god is by far better than a blessing that takes you away from god” – I love love love this quote and if one of the good things that comes out of this journey of grief is that you’re more in touch with your faith – this is enough.

8. If you don’t pray – take time to reflect regularly.

If you do not have a religion – I would definitely recommend you take some time out during the day/week for reflection. Whether that be writing a journal or having 15 minutes to think about things on a night before getting on with your routine. Reflection/meditation/an outlet for your emotions is so so essential during the time of grief and it can be extremely powerful.

9. Life goes on.

This is one of the hardest realities but it’s true – life goes on. You can’t stay stuck in your bubble of grief for too long because everyone will start moving on and you’ll almost be annoyed at them for doing so – but you will have to eventually too. Slowly and in your own time, start to think about what you want from life and start to live it again. Don’t feel guilty for moving on – it does not mean you have forgotten that person, just that you need to carry on for your friends and family and everyone you still have around. Keep going and I promise you’ll learn to accept it in time.

10. Keep the faith – it does get easier to accept as time goes on.

Lastly, stay strong guys. Its not easy and I can’t think of much pain which is worse than losing someone you love but I promise if you take the time out to remember but more importantly, stay grateful for what you still have – I promise it will get easier.

Thank you for reading guys and if you got this far – well done! Haha. If you are currently going through a bereavement, I know this post won’t change what you’re going through – but I hope it helped you in better understanding what you may be feeling and the fact that things will get easier. & if you know someone who is currently going through a bereavement, I hope this post gave you a little insight into how they may be feeling. If you feel you have overcome the loss of someone but are finding it difficult to get back to normal daily living – read my post about getting out of a funk.

If you have any questions at all, please do not hesitate to leave a comment or send me a message. Lastly, you’re doing so well – please remember that.

Thank you for reading and I will see you all in my next blog post!

Tayyeba xx

Ever since I heard there were Turkish Baths in Harrogate I’ve been desperate to go! The last time i’d been to a Turkish Bath was when I was like 12 years old in Istanbul and it was one of the strangest experiences ever (pretty much an old naked lady bathing you – strange to say the least). Obviously I knew that wouldn’t be the case in Harrogate but nonetheless, I was intrigued.

Before I get into our experience though, I thought I would give you a quick overview of the costs first…

Costs and timings:

It cost us £17.50 for a session from 1pm-5pm. It was a ladies only session as well which was good. They have a few ladies only sessions on during the week however at the weekend the price is nearly doubled, the sessions are 2 hours shorter and they’re only mixed sessions, so in my opinion – weekdays are better!

Okay, so I won’t lie guys – there isn’t a whole lot to tell.

Although the session started at 1pm, we arrived at around 3ish because we were advised by a lady working there that people usually spend on average 2 hours there – which for us, was more than enough. We really wanted to get a treatment – they do reflexology, full body massages and a variety of treatments but unfortunately we enquired too late and they were already fully booked!

When we arrived, the first thing I found really impressive was just HOW dated everything was – the toilets, changing rooms, doors etc. and it had a really authentic vibe which I loved. It had a similar feel to the baths in Turkey which I was quite surprised by as I thought they would have made it all modern and ruined the original baths.

The different chambers and facilities:

Okay, so as soon as you walk in there is a relaxation room which is around 30 degrees. Here there were a lot of beds and people were reading magazines and books and it was basically just a quiet room to chill in before and after your treatment to acclimatize your body before and after the other chambers.

They then had an area with showers and a steam room. They recommended to shower first then go into the steam room then come out and either go into the plunge pool or have a cold shower. We stayed in the steam room for a few minutes but I CANNOT take too much heat so had to get out ASAP. The cold shower after was quite refreshing after the steam room but the plunge pool was COLD AF. I could barely put my feet in LMAO.

Following this, they had three heated chambers. One was 40 degrees, the second around 60 degrees and the final one was around 75 DEGREES – I KNOW GUYS, WTH – SO FRICKING HOT. Apparently you’re meant to slowly work your way up the rooms in terms of heat but in the second chamber my feet were on fire so we gave up hahaha.

And literally guys – that was it.

I am not going to lie, I was quite underwhelmed. For me personally, I felt it was just some heated rooms, a sauna, some showers and a cold pool. I’ve been to quite a few spas in the past but I won’t lie – I wouldn’t really class this as a spa day, it was more just a relaxing few hours. I think because we had not been before, we weren’t really sure on what to expect – but we also thought it was going to be like spas we had visited before, so this is maybe why we didn’t enjoy it as much.

I can however kind of understand why people rave about it – it’s relaxing and a very different experience and I am really glad I finally visited. But if i’m honest, I think I would only ever go back if I got a treatment as well, otherwise I don’t really think it is anything special. Saying that though, I do feel we didn’t maybe make full use of the facilities because we just couldn’t acclimatize to the different rooms. 

If you are wanting to visit the baths – I would definitely recommend visiting during the week as I did enjoy how quiet and peaceful it was. I would also recommend you get a treatment alongside the baths so that you can relax in the chambers before and after your treatment.

So there you have it guys – my review on the Turkish baths. I love going to spas and getting treatments, so i’m sure I’ll do some comparisons in the future!

Until next week guys!

Tayybs xx

Hey guys,

If you’re returning to my blog, thank you! & if you’re new around these ends – welcome! I hope you enjoy.

If you follow me on social media, you’ll know that I visited Thailand this summer and I was REALLY. FRICKING. EXCITED ABOUT THIS. I had literally wanted to go since I finished university but just never got round to planning it and eventually after asking my sister if she was on board (she ALWAYS makes shit happen) – we had booked our flights within a week and it was actually happening! (Thanks for always making shit happen Nim).

We decided to travel around Thailand a bit rather than just visit one place as we wanted to go the touristy places that you see all over google images but also visit the capital and see the city life.

Where we visited:

Over the ten days we were there, we visited Bangkok, Old Phuket Town, Phuket and The Phi Phi Islands. We booked internal flights separate to the main flights there and back as this worked out much cheaper. Looking back I do think there was A LOT of travelling and we said that we wish we’d stayed in Bangkok for longer as we enjoyed it the most.

Now you could imagine – It was super picturesque and we took around 2000 pictures so I thought it would be nice to make this post a little bit of a photo diary of my time in Thailand! I hope you enjoy 🙂

Bangkok

We visited the Floating Markets just outside of Bangkok. This was definitely one of my favourite experiences.

Phi Phi Islands

Phuket

Elephant Jungle Sanctuary Phuket

Last Day in Kata

My favourite part – The MASSAGES.

Guys no joke – I would happily go back to Thailand JUST for the massages. Being able to just walk into a parlour, sit outside in the warmth getting a foot massage for a fiver – HEAVEN. I love love love massages so literally over EVERYTHING you’ve just seen – this was my favourite bit haha. We had a massage almost every night and most of the places were pretty decent!

So there you have it guys – my trip to Thailand in pictures. I am sorry if that was a slight picture overload but as I said – I got these down from like 2000 so I think we did well! Haha. Thank you so much for having a read of this post and if you have any Thailand related questions, please do not hesitate to ask! 🙂

Ciao for now!

Tayyeba xx

When I was sixteen, I was finally allowed to wear a good amount of makeup. As any girl would be, I was really excited about this and as I was going to Switzerland on a school trip – it was time to go on my first proper make up shop (a BIG moment for any young girl). I visited The Body Shop for this as I had grown up seeing my sisters use Body Shop products and as I was quite young, I wanted something light and natural that wouldn’t ruin my skin. This overly glam, bubbly girl working there gave me a full makeover and this is where I decided what my life goal was – TO BECOME A BODY SHOP GIRL (I know guys, I know).

I think because I was young and impressionable, I just fell in love with all the things she used on me so I bought it all and from then on, I became obsessed with their products. I would recommend their stuff to everyone, use them all the time and my dream of wanting to be a Body Shop girl got stronger (btw I don’t think a ‘Body Shop Girl’ is a thing but I think I kind of made it one lmao).

After being a regular in the Leeds Briggate store, I applied for a job there one day and after a fairly easy process (because they knew I was OBSESSED) – I got the job! YES GUYS I REACHED MY GOAL OF BEING A BODY SHOP GIRL! Because I was so passionate about their makeup in particular – I would work mostly on the makeup/skincare stands giving makeovers to clients and raving about their products (the passion WAS REAL). What I loved most was when customers would ask what I was wearing on my eyes or skin and I’d be like “HEY LET ME SHOW YOU” because I legit wore everything from there and was their number one fan LOL.

I got the chance to become a Makeup Expert in one of the other stores so moved there and continued to love the life of being a Body Shop Girl (by now, I can assure you the novelty had worn off). For me the thing I loved the most about this company was the back stories to their products and it is still one thing I love most about them. Understanding how the product ingredients were sourced and where they came from made selling the products so much more interesting.

I knew my time at The Body Shop was going to come to an end one day as it wasn’t my chosen career path and I’d outgrown my role there. I left after 3 years of working there and at least I could say I achieved my dream of being a Body Shop girl haha. (Sidenote: I am aware not many people are this enthusiastic about being a Body Shop girl but it was just my little thing growing up haha).

Although I don’t work there anymore – I am still mega obsessed with some of their products and this is why when I was invited to the Bloggers event in York – I couldn’t say no as I have such a history with this company and they played such a big part in my life. I thought it would be good to share with you guys my MUST HAVES from The Body Shop as I still think it is quite an under rated store for make-up and skin care whereas I love some of their stuff. All these products I mention below are things I still use every day and I am genuinely blogging about them because I LOVE THEM.

1. Vitamin E INTENSE Moisture Cream

MY HOLY GRAIL. The reason I’ve highlighted the “intense” is because they have a best seller which is the original Vitamin E cream but I love this one SO much more and again, because I have dry skin, it is my saviour. It has olive in it which makes it thicker but it is not greasy at all and it genuinely keeps my skin hydrated all year round. I use it in winter and summer and it suits my needs during each season. Although the foundation used to be my favourite product from TBS, this has definitely taken over and at the moment I have three tubs stocked up – this is how much of it I go through. If I don’t wear this or run out, I can see how much it affects my skin. Guys – I WOULD RECOMMEND THIS 100 TIMES OVER AND IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT –GIVE IT TO ME PLEASE. THANKS!

2. Moisture Foundation 07

Guys believe it or not, this is the foundation that was tested on me when I was 16 and this is the exact same foundation I put on this morning (not the same bottle but you get my drift). I won’t lie, as times gone on, I have experimented here and there but this is still my GO TO for everyday dewy, good coverage foundation. Because my skin is quite dry, its great at keeping it hydrated (it contains Marula oil sourced from Namibia) and there have been many times I’ve just layered it up for a night time – more fuller look. So many people have asked me which foundation I wear when I have this on and I stock up on it when there’s a sale because I LOVE IT. [EDIT: Unfortunately shortly after posting this post I found out this product was being discontinued *cries* & I was GUTTED. Usually when something is discontinued however, they bring them out at sale times until they have run out – so I would definitely say have a look out during sale time and they should have it in and HALF THE PRICE -every cloud guys, every cloud). I am sorry though! However I have decided I am going to do a post in the near future of foundations I have found that are similar to this so hopefully if you’re interested in this product – keep your eyes peeled!

3. Brow and Liner Kit 03

This one guys, isn’t because it’s the most amazing product in the world – as I haven’t used many other brow kits. It’s more because of the value for money. It costs £10 and lasts over 6 months! It does the job, my eyebrows never budge and every time I think I’ll experiment with another brand – I just go back to this one because it’s so convenient. During my sister’s wedding period I noticed that a lot of our makeup artists also used this kit for our brows – so I guess it’s pretty good for professionals too. I don’t usually use the little applicator that comes with it as I don’t like it, although I know most people do. I usually buy one from H&M for like £1.99 as I feel these work better and last me years.

4. Coconut hand cream

THIS. SMELLS. DEVINE. I won’t lie – moisturising wise, it doesn’t last that long which really annoys me because IT SMELLS SO DAMN GOOD. Every time I use it I can guarantee that one person will say “oooh who just sprayed coconut”. So I guess the smell is strong, but the moisture doesn’t last as long as I would want. When I first put it on though, my hands feel soooo moisturised and good and I fricking love it (till I wash them unfortunately). Another thing that annoys me is that the packaging for these are really small so you get through one fairly fast. They’ve now started to do bigger sizes for the other flavours which I was so excited about BUT THEY DON’T DO COCONUT ARGHH.

5. Aloe & Soft Linen Body, Room & Linen Spritz

Every time I clean a room – I spray this after and it just smells SO DAMN CLEAN. There is no other way to describe it other than clean. It makes the room feel so fresh and I just love it – again, one of my must haves.

6. Matte Lip Liquid in Crete Carnation 030

When I heard The Body Shop were doing matte liquid lipsticks I freaked. I was so excited and when I went to see them, the colours were stunning (as you can see above)! I bought the colour Crete Carnation as I thought I’d try one before buying more. This colour for me is such perfect coraly nude (if you get me) and I’ve been wearing it every day at the moment! I won’t lie it doesn’t last as long as some of my other lip products but the colour is so beaut, it smells SO good and it glides on so nicely because it’s super creamy! Sorry I didn’t do a swatch of the colour but i’m still getting used to this blogger life and annoyingly I didn’t get chance to get a picture before I wanted to post – I promise if I get a good picture of this colour soon I will update this page!

So there you have it – my Body Shop must haves that I use every day! The great thing about The Body Shop is that there is ALWAYS SOME SALE ON. I have NEVER bought anything full price because they always have some offer on. You can find offers on Voucher Cloud or their website. They also do reward cards where you get a free £5 gift in your birthday month – so I think I last got an eyebrow kit for a fiver – not bad!

At the moment they have a Black Friday sale on where you get 40% OFF, just use the code 19806 to claim this at the checkout!

I hope you found this post useful guys – happy shopping!

Tayyeba xx

Hey guys!

So this second post of mine is a little less about me and a little more about supporting you guys with things you may be going through. You may or may not know that I work as a therapist – so daily I am helping people to manage their difficulties and I just felt it wouldn’t be right for me not to share some things I have learnt along the way!

Today I want to talk about ways to get out of a funk – if you know what a funk is, brilliant – and if you don’t, just keep reading…

Have you ever been through a time of your life when you just feel ‘meh’? There is literally no other word to describe the feeling other than this feeling of ‘meh’. It’s not necessarily feeling depressed, just more of an empty feeling where nothing can make you feel motivated or inspired. You just feel flat and bored of life. Surprisingly, it can even happen after an exciting time in your life – but nonetheless, it’s not a great feeling. This my friends, IS A FUNK.

I’ve noticed since the weather is getting colder and nights darker, many people say how they’re feeling miserable because winter just makes them feel meh. This got me thinking that it would be the perfect time to post about this topic – either before you see yourself slipping into a funk, or if you just need to get out of one badly.

I’d be lying if I said I couldn’t relate to this – as I said, we have ALL been there at one point or another. My biggest funk I can remember was right after my sister’s wedding. You could imagine – the run up to it is so busy and exciting and then BAM, you’re back to work and living your mundane life with very little excitement. I was left feeling uninspired, bored and just generally dull. The same happened after I got engaged – I was on cloud nine for a few weeks then reality hit and I realised that my wedding is a thing of the distant future (and comes with its own stressors) and for now, life is quite ‘BLEUGH’.

Although feeling this way will usually pass, there are things you can do to manage your mood better. If you think you can relate to this feeling – keep reading and take some of these tips on board. Before we get into them though, I have to warn you – it takes a lot of DOING, so if you really feel motivated and want to snap out of this feeling, you’re in the right place.

1: Know your trigger

I genuinely believe that you don’t just randomly feel down one day – there is usually something that has triggered you to feel this way. I always think it is extremely important to first identify this. That is if recognising the problem is something that will help us in overcoming it. If you can get to the root cause of why you feel this way, sometimes it can help you get out of it a lot quicker. So for example, Have you just finished university but are not working in your chosen field? Are you studying your A levels and feel like they’re NEVER ENDING. (Yeah that phase of life is the worst). Have you not got a job and are feeling unmotivated? Are you in a dead end relationship that just brings you down?

Usually there is something that has triggered you feeling this way and identifying your enemy is the first step to helping you manage your feelings. If it is something you can change – brilliant – you can continue through the steps and solve out how to change it. But if you can’t – try some of the other tips to help you lift your mood.

2: Set a new goal

Honestly this one is so simple but most powerful. It gives you a sense of purpose – one thing we usually lack when feeling like every day is a drag. Set some realistic goals for yourself to achieve each day or week and I promise you, if you start to work hard to achieve them – you will naturally become more motivated and more focused again. Write your goals down and keep them with you and DO NOT give in until you’ve achieved it. If you are feeling incredibly low/lazy – start small. Start with something as little as finally cleaning out that wardrobe you’ve been dreading to clean or finishing that paragraph of the essay you’re taking forever to get through, or finally doing your CV. If you feel up to it, make a bigger one – a goal to maybe get a promotion, change your career path, have a difficult conversation with someone that you’ve been putting off. Remember your goal has to be linked to WHY you’re feeling this way – hence why step number one is important. So the examples I have just given may not even be relevant to you, but you get the gist. I am telling you guys – NOTHING feels more empowering than achieving that goal, and no matter how difficult it is to get there – you’ll feel awesome once you’ve reached.

3: Make a plan to achieve your goal

This one is harder, especially when you’re already feeling unmotivated – DOING IT. I am the classic example of all talk, no action (yup I admit it). I said around 7 years ago I’d start a blog – did I ever do it? Nope. I was practically forced to! This is why it is really important that once you’ve got that goal – make it extremely clear to yourself how you will achieve it. If you tell yourself you’re going to finish an essay before the end of the week – does that mean you end up doing so? Nope. So it’s vital that you start to think about AND DO the exact steps you have to, to get there. Be pedantic and think of the smallest things you’ll have to do to get there – get a piece of paper and write it down so you can visualise what you have to do to get there. Take small steps – but ensure the end result is your goal.

4: Talk to someone

Guys you know that saying, “a problem shared is a problem halved?” Yes it is so so true. Sometimes just telling someone how we feel and what’s been going on can be enough to help us offload and feel better instantly. If you’re finding it difficult to talk to someone because you don’t quite understand what you’re feeling yourself, I can guarantee you people surprise you, and you might even find someone else has felt the same at one point or can at least give you some good advice to help you. Use others and keep connecting. If you have found you’ve withdrawn a bit and don’t see people as much – send them a random message and ask to meet up, or just reach out to someone– the people around us are the ones that can truly bring us out of the worst situations in our lives and I am a firm believer in this.

5: Create more structure in your week

Take a look at your week and see how fulfilling it is for you. Do you just come home from work/school and just sit in front of the telly all evening – then feel really crap about it later? Or do you find yourself not doing a lot throughout the day and just staying in bed, and feeling no better by it and just really guilty? Guys having a Netflix binge on the sofa is needed sometimes – In fact, ITS HEALTHY. But if you’re feeling rubbish because of this or like you’re not getting enough done – start to schedule in some things that need to get done amongst these. Again, gradually build these into your routine and try hard to have some nights where you just relax and watch telly– but then others where you might go out with some friends or some when you’re getting serious work done. It’s all about balance and unfortunately once you lose that balance, it just makes you feel worse. Recently, me and my siblings felt a bit bored when we hang out so we decided to start playing badminton on a Thursday night – we enjoy it, it’s a bit different and it mixes up our routine a little (and it’s good for all those carbs we eat!).

6: Pick up a new hobby

Picking up an old hobby or taking interest in something new can feel so good. If you’ve found you used to do something and have stopped since feeling ‘meh’ – get back into it, it’ll be tough but I can guarantee it’ll motivate you to keep going. Or if you are like me and don’t have a particular hobby, maybe try something a bit different that’s out of your comfort zone or explore what you do like. Learning new skills in an area, can make you feel really fulfilled and gives you something to focus on. Believe it or not once I was feeling so bored of life I joined a walking group LOL. This was all good until I realised everyone was 60+ and it wasn’t going to work out haha. But hey – the intention was there right?!

Okay so there you have my little tips that can really make a big difference guys. When you feel this way – it is all basically about identifying why you do and then learning ways of how to combat it! Whether it is through solving the issue or getting motivated. Although these tips seem simple, I specifically chose these ones because I feel they are the most powerful and ones you can see a difference with really quick.

NOW THAT WAS LONG – JEEEZ.

I really hope you guys enjoyed this post – it was a little different but I hope it made you think a little about if you’re living the life you want to and what you can do to get there if you’re not! If you have any good tips on how to get out of a funk or things that work for you – feel free to message me and let me know! I’m all for learning new things!

Until next time!
Tayyeba xx

So guys, it’s official… I have finally embarked on the wonderful journey that is blogging.

I have wanted to blog for many years now and have always put it off because it’s never quite been ‘the right time’. University, work, post grad, holidays, family weddings – you name it – basically any excuse to just not do it. I think it’s because there’s always that chance that you won’t continue with it or really stay committed to it, so it took me some time to take that leap of faith – and here I am writing my first post!

A little bit about me…

My name is Tayyeba and I am twenty four years old. I could fill this post with all of the great hobbies and interests I have but I can’t lie –The thing I love to do above everything is binge watch my favourite series on Netflix with a LARGE cup of tea (PG tips FTW). I am currently obsessed with Stranger Things and Jane the Virgin – if you haven’t already started these, I suggest you do!

Other than this, I love days out exploring different areas of our beautiful country, whether it be visiting landmarks, going for walks or dining at pretty places (I said I was being honest right?). I AM THE BIGGEST FOODIE. I love going out for Thai and Indian street food – they’re my fave.

I love travelling and experiencing different cultures and I have vowed to myself that one day I WILL visit all the countries of the world (I am currently only around 10 down, but hey – at least I’ve made a start right?).

By day, I work as a Therapist (you can read more about this here) and I am currently engaged – both of these things will feature on the blog often I am sure.

I am currently going through a transitional phase in my life of becoming a ‘proper’ grown up; planning a wedding, looking for houses, establishing my career and learning how to cook like my mum (yeah this last one isn’t going so well). It’s quite a big step with many mixed emotions and I am excited to share all the crazy with you as I go through them!

So why am I blogging?

As I have already mentioned, this has been something I have wanted to do for a LONG time and the longer I leave it, the more I regret not doing it! I’ve been pushed by a lot of people to do this as I never quite had the courage to just go for it and I guess you could say their tough love worked – as I am here now!

I’ll be honest, I always felt I would be more of a vlogger as I talk a lot, I’m an extrovert and do love having a rant on Snapchat, however since working as a therapist – I have found writing things down and projecting yourself this way can be really powerful. I often find myself so engrossed when reading through people’s blog posts about specific topics that are important to me and I love the idea of being able to relate to someone who doesn’t even know you. The advice and encouragement you can sometimes get by just reading something a stranger has written can be so empowering, and this made me want to go down this route. I am really hoping my future blog posts can give advice, encouragement and motivation to you guys when you need it most.

What the blogging future looks like…

There is no set agenda for what my blog will bring – but I just know I have a LOT to say, and I hope you guys will enjoy reading!

I want this blog to be like a blank canvas that I just add to whenever I feel I want to talk about something in particular. I am hoping to cover a mixture of mainstream topics like reviewing food, my travels and beauty products – but I also want to get into the heavier stuff such as mental health and life in general. I also want to document important moments in my life as they happen, which I hope you guys will want to hear all about (you don’t really have a choice in the matter, sorry).

As mentioned before, I recently got engaged (yay me) and I am excited to share my wedding planning journey with you guys! We do it proper Punjabi style – the glam outfits, wedding shopping in Pakistan and of course, THE DANCING! (My fave bit!!).

Okay, so I have written MORE than enough now. I hope you guys feel like you know me a little better and I really hope you’re as excited as me about this blog (I’m pretty sure you’re not) but thank you for stopping by and I hope to see you real soon when I next post!

Thanks once again!

Tayyeba!
xxx