Six steps to getting out of a funk!

Hey guys!

So this second post of mine is a little less about me and a little more about supporting you guys with things you may be going through. You may or may not know that I work as a therapist – so daily I am helping people to manage their difficulties and I just felt it wouldn’t be right for me not to share some things I have learnt along the way!

Today I want to talk about ways to get out of a funk – if you know what a funk is, brilliant – and if you don’t, just keep reading…

Have you ever been through a time of your life when you just feel ‘meh’? There is literally no other word to describe the feeling other than this feeling of ‘meh’. It’s not necessarily feeling depressed, just more of an empty feeling where nothing can make you feel motivated or inspired. You just feel flat and bored of life. Surprisingly, it can even happen after an exciting time in your life – but nonetheless, it’s not a great feeling. This my friends, IS A FUNK.

I’ve noticed since the weather is getting colder and nights darker, many people say how they’re feeling miserable because winter just makes them feel meh. This got me thinking that it would be the perfect time to post about this topic – either before you see yourself slipping into a funk, or if you just need to get out of one badly.

I’d be lying if I said I couldn’t relate to this – as I said, we have ALL been there at one point or another. My biggest funk I can remember was right after my sister’s wedding. You could imagine – the run up to it is so busy and exciting and then BAM, you’re back to work and living your mundane life with very little excitement. I was left feeling uninspired, bored and just generally dull. The same happened after I got engaged – I was on cloud nine for a few weeks then reality hit and I realised that my wedding is a thing of the distant future (and comes with its own stressors) and for now, life is quite ‘BLEUGH’.

Although feeling this way will usually pass, there are things you can do to manage your mood better. If you think you can relate to this feeling – keep reading and take some of these tips on board. Before we get into them though, I have to warn you – it takes a lot of DOING, so if you really feel motivated and want to snap out of this feeling, you’re in the right place.

1: Know your trigger

I genuinely believe that you don’t just randomly feel down one day – there is usually something that has triggered you to feel this way. I always think it is extremely important to first identify this. That is if recognising the problem is something that will help us in overcoming it. If you can get to the root cause of why you feel this way, sometimes it can help you get out of it a lot quicker. So for example, Have you just finished university but are not working in your chosen field? Are you studying your A levels and feel like they’re NEVER ENDING. (Yeah that phase of life is the worst). Have you not got a job and are feeling unmotivated? Are you in a dead end relationship that just brings you down?

Usually there is something that has triggered you feeling this way and identifying your enemy is the first step to helping you manage your feelings. If it is something you can change – brilliant – you can continue through the steps and solve out how to change it. But if you can’t – try some of the other tips to help you lift your mood.

2: Set a new goal

Honestly this one is so simple but most powerful. It gives you a sense of purpose – one thing we usually lack when feeling like every day is a drag. Set some realistic goals for yourself to achieve each day or week and I promise you, if you start to work hard to achieve them – you will naturally become more motivated and more focused again. Write your goals down and keep them with you and DO NOT give in until you’ve achieved it. If you are feeling incredibly low/lazy – start small. Start with something as little as finally cleaning out that wardrobe you’ve been dreading to clean or finishing that paragraph of the essay you’re taking forever to get through, or finally doing your CV. If you feel up to it, make a bigger one – a goal to maybe get a promotion, change your career path, have a difficult conversation with someone that you’ve been putting off. Remember your goal has to be linked to WHY you’re feeling this way – hence why step number one is important. So the examples I have just given may not even be relevant to you, but you get the gist. I am telling you guys – NOTHING feels more empowering than achieving that goal, and no matter how difficult it is to get there – you’ll feel awesome once you’ve reached.

3: Make a plan to achieve your goal

This one is harder, especially when you’re already feeling unmotivated – DOING IT. I am the classic example of all talk, no action (yup I admit it). I said around 7 years ago I’d start a blog – did I ever do it? Nope. I was practically forced to! This is why it is really important that once you’ve got that goal – make it extremely clear to yourself how you will achieve it. If you tell yourself you’re going to finish an essay before the end of the week – does that mean you end up doing so? Nope. So it’s vital that you start to think about AND DO the exact steps you have to, to get there. Be pedantic and think of the smallest things you’ll have to do to get there – get a piece of paper and write it down so you can visualise what you have to do to get there. Take small steps – but ensure the end result is your goal.

4: Talk to someone

Guys you know that saying, “a problem shared is a problem halved?” Yes it is so so true. Sometimes just telling someone how we feel and what’s been going on can be enough to help us offload and feel better instantly. If you’re finding it difficult to talk to someone because you don’t quite understand what you’re feeling yourself, I can guarantee you people surprise you, and you might even find someone else has felt the same at one point or can at least give you some good advice to help you. Use others and keep connecting. If you have found you’ve withdrawn a bit and don’t see people as much – send them a random message and ask to meet up, or just reach out to someone– the people around us are the ones that can truly bring us out of the worst situations in our lives and I am a firm believer in this.

5: Create more structure in your week

Take a look at your week and see how fulfilling it is for you. Do you just come home from work/school and just sit in front of the telly all evening – then feel really crap about it later? Or do you find yourself not doing a lot throughout the day and just staying in bed, and feeling no better by it and just really guilty? Guys having a Netflix binge on the sofa is needed sometimes – In fact, ITS HEALTHY. But if you’re feeling rubbish because of this or like you’re not getting enough done – start to schedule in some things that need to get done amongst these. Again, gradually build these into your routine and try hard to have some nights where you just relax and watch telly– but then others where you might go out with some friends or some when you’re getting serious work done. It’s all about balance and unfortunately once you lose that balance, it just makes you feel worse. Recently, me and my siblings felt a bit bored when we hang out so we decided to start playing badminton on a Thursday night – we enjoy it, it’s a bit different and it mixes up our routine a little (and it’s good for all those carbs we eat!).

6: Pick up a new hobby

Picking up an old hobby or taking interest in something new can feel so good. If you’ve found you used to do something and have stopped since feeling ‘meh’ – get back into it, it’ll be tough but I can guarantee it’ll motivate you to keep going. Or if you are like me and don’t have a particular hobby, maybe try something a bit different that’s out of your comfort zone or explore what you do like. Learning new skills in an area, can make you feel really fulfilled and gives you something to focus on. Believe it or not once I was feeling so bored of life I joined a walking group LOL. This was all good until I realised everyone was 60+ and it wasn’t going to work out haha. But hey – the intention was there right?!

Okay so there you have my little tips that can really make a big difference guys. When you feel this way – it is all basically about identifying why you do and then learning ways of how to combat it! Whether it is through solving the issue or getting motivated. Although these tips seem simple, I specifically chose these ones because I feel they are the most powerful and ones you can see a difference with really quick.

NOW THAT WAS LONG – JEEEZ.

I really hope you guys enjoyed this post – it was a little different but I hope it made you think a little about if you’re living the life you want to and what you can do to get there if you’re not! If you have any good tips on how to get out of a funk or things that work for you – feel free to message me and let me know! I’m all for learning new things!

Until next time!
Tayyeba xx